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Heartwings Love Notes 942 - Respect for One's Self is Vital

Heartwings says, "Let us remember that self-respect is as important as respecting others."

When I was little, I was taught to stand up when adults entered the room. I was told to listen when spoken to and not to interrupt. I was instructed to write thank you notes when I received a gift and to say" thank you," or "you're welcome,", as opposed to "no problem," when appropriate. This was called good manners and was a sign of respect for one's elders. To be sure, despite being taught to respect others, no one thought to teach me to respect myself.

Perhaps that sounds odd. How do you teach self-respect? Maybe you learn to respect yourself by the virtue of being respected by others. When I was growing up, no one thought much about respecting children. The axiom, "Children are to be seen and not heard" was in full force when I was in my single digits. I was told to respect others, and it never occurred to me that perhaps they ought to respect me, or That respect was a two-way street. I was "only a child."

My mother and her two sisters had it worse. Their father was in the diplomatic service and the guests to their home for formal or informal occasions often brought candy or other treats for the host's children. Her mother thanked the giver politely and whisked the candy away, saying to the little girls, "This is for the guests." One friend of my mother's friends co-opted the hard earned savings of her three sons to purchase a car. She said, "They get to ride in it, so they can help pay for it. She was notoriously stingy.

I try to respect myself. What is especially important for me is respecting my limits. This is a difficult one for me because I confess to being a people pleaser and so have often over taxed myself in an effort to be kind and nice. However, since I had my hip operation, I have had to deal with limits to my mobility and to my strength. While I try to expand those limits, I also realize I must acknowledge them. Lessons come to us in ways we need to learn. As I grow in my ability to respect my own limits I will also attain more efficacy in respecting those of others, and for this I am grateful.

May you appreciate your opportunities to learn and grow.

PS Learned any good lessons lately? I so enjoy it when readers share their experiences. Your emails make my day. Write me at tashahal@gmail.com, and check out my website at www.heartwingsandfriends.com for more love notes.
 

I love to hear from readers and would be honored if you would comment and let me know any suggestions or thoughts. If a friend sent you this, you can sign up at my web site, www.heartwingslovenotes.com, where more love notes can be found in the archives.

Blessings and Best Regards,
Tasha Halpert
 

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